Horrible Ideas…

MMA fighting with flip-flops

MMA is the kind of sport that will entertain you and terrify you at the same time. As a horror movie fan, it’s no surprise this beautiful form of athleticism is appealing to me.

Watching an athlete win with a submission, K.O, or T.K.O, is exciting. However, those times when a fight ends with a decision, it can be disappointing. I don’t understand the scoring system, but, I think, if we made the athletes fight with flip-flops, and lose a point each time the flip-flop fell off a foot, a win by decision would be more obvious, have less controversy, and be more rewarding.

MMAthongs

Plus, imagine the tension of a fight with this added problem, which could also have a surprise factor: would a fighter be angered enough to launch a flip-flop attack on his enemy, despite losing points? What does a kick with a flip-flop on look like? These are the questions that need answers.

MMAthongoffensive

Screaming Yoga

Yoga is meditation in movement… right?. But there’s a level of pain and frustration that comes with it, as our minds still ramble on. So, why not let our feelings out with screams? As we move into a downward dog, or try to keep our balance in one leg, why not let out a shout? Imagine that, you can quickly silence your thoughts while your hands try to touch your feet, but fail.

Nice.

ScreamingYoga

Scream some more, as you remember that time when you traumatised a child on a plane, because you watched a horror movie while you were sitting next to him. It’s ok, it’s just a thought, that kid is fine. Let it flow, scream and live in the now.

ScreamingYoga

Starting conversations with embarrassing confessions, unpopular opinions, or math problems

Small talk is painful, so why not make it excruciating and guarantee you won’t have to engage in small talk with that person again, by telling them something embarrassing when you see them? It will be raw, liberating, and it will give you the power of invisibility the next time this person sees you. You could also express an unpopular opinion, or confront them with a math problem. Any of these options will produce the same results.

Embarrassing

Doubleembarrassing

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Small Protests & Performance Art

Protests are a tool we should use more often.

Society has a lot of problems, but some of them are so small, we might think speaking out against such issues, and trying to fix them, is not worth the effort.

This is why I’ve decided to demonstrate, through a few examples of small, yet important protests, that they are worth the effort. I’ve paired these protests with tasteful performance art pieces to enhance their message.

Let’s begin with a cry from a man that needs to be heard:

SpoonProtest

Right?

Now, the artistic side of the protest:

VegetableOffer

It’s beautiful, it’s art, it’s emotion, it’s the beginning of change.

Our next protest:

OnionProtest

Onions have had enough of our tears. Would you disagree? I don’t think so.

Let’s transform it into art!

OnionArt

No more tears, onions. No. More. Tears.

Our last issue:

PajamasProtest

I know many share this sentiment.

But let’s illustrate our point with art:

PajamasArt

There you have it, anger expressed through art, with the intention to transform society’s smaller issues.

I hope this was inspiring.

How to achieve mental toughness

 

DISCLAIMER: Strictly for laughing purposes.

 

The Endurance Test

  1. Find a maths class to attend.
  2. Endure it from beginning to end, paying complete attention to the lesson, but without taking notes, since that would take away some of the focus and mental suffering.
  3. Don’t cry.

MathsEww

The Facing Yourself At Your Worst Test

  1. Find pictures of your high school years or whenever you had that “weird phase”.
  2. Sit in a room by yourself and stare at them. Take at least a minute with each photograph, let the memory of your inadequate past self resurface and torment you.
  3. Don’t cry.

PhotoAlbum

The Other People’s Opinion Test

  1. Dress unfashionably. If you can avoid combing your hair or even showering, that would be more effective.
  2. Get out of the house to go shopping, do groceries, or any activity that involves being surrounded by people.
  3. See how they silently judge your appearance and feel how offended they are by you.
  4. Don’t cry.

Unfashionable

The Can’t Be Emotionally Moved Test

  1. Go to a pet store, one that has the cutest, fluffiest animals.
  2. Take your time to stare at them, look into their eyes, allow them to stare back into your soul.
  3. Consider adopting one, think about how happy you could make this tiny creature, spending your lives together, but don’t do it.
  4. Don’t cry.

PetStore

The Temptation Test

  1. Buy your favorite candy. It could be a chocolate bar, cookies, cake, ice cream; it’s your choice, but make sure it’s your absolute favorite.
  2. Keep it in your house, place it somewhere visible and write a little sign, saying “Eat me!”, that you can put on top of it, but don’t follow that command.
  3. Feel the temptation sinking into your brain and bones, turning you into a candy-craving zombie, but don’t eat it.
  4. Don’t cry.

TemptationCandy

The Rejection Test

  1. Tell that person you like how you feel, but do it in a creepy way. A good idea would be to draw the two of you happy together, and show this drawing to the person as you tell them about the eternal love you feel for them, even if you have never spoken to them before.
  2. Get rejected.
  3. Don’t cry.

Rejection